Maya Rossignac-Milon

Human beings have two fundamental needs above and beyond basic survival:

1. Relational needs: to develop and maintain social relationships with others.
2. Epistemic needs: to establish the sense of knowing what is real and true in the world.

Both needs are dependent on other people. While we can, of course, have our own version of the truth, feeling alone in our opinions can undermine the extent to which those opinions feel real and true. When our opinions are shared with others, they come to feel more real, more factual — as though they reflect the objective truth.

Having our own version of reality, beyond undermining our feeling of being “right” about things, can socially isolate us from other people. When we feel on the same wavelength as others, we feel connected to them — we feel that we belong. Humans are fundamentally social creatures, and threatening this sense of social connection can rattle us at our core.

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